omg end of term

For the last couple of weeks I have been dealing with my crazy mother. She checked herself into a psych ward at a local hospital. She exclaimed that she wanted to take enough pills in order to not wake up ever again. Now you may can feel in my writing that there is no sympathy and here is why, When I was a child I felt this way as well. My mom told me that if I really wanted to kill myself that I would be dead by now. There was no sympathy for me. She has told me (at 9 years old) that she never wanted me and that if it was not for my grandparents then I would not even be here. "Who wants to get pregnant at 17, no I did'nt want you". Maybe I was the one who took it wrong but you know what I would have never said anything like that to either one of my children. I have two beautiful children that she will not have anything to do with. My daughter's name is Markailyn. I named her that because my son name is Shemar and I wanted some similarities in the name. Also my husbands name is Leonard but we call him Lynn. My mother however does not call my daughter by her name. She calls her Sweet Potato. Now that may sound cute, to some but I don't like it. That has been expressed but of course I do believe she does shit like that to piss me off.
We are at the end of the term and I have neglected my studies because of her. Has she ever done anything for me. Most of my life I lived with my grandmother. There was never a time that I can remember that she ever done anything or said anything nice to me. When I was 10 i had my first cycle. When it went off it did not come back till I was 12. My mother just knew that I was pregnant and instead of asking me if I was having sex (which I was not) every week or so she would make me pee in a cup. At the time I did not know why but now as an adult I realise what was going on. When I turned 12 she then went on and put me on birth control. And I still was not screwing around. I still blame her for me having sex at a young age because I figured well if she gave me condoms and bc then she must feel as if it is ok to have sex.
My only regret is that I worried about her, because she never worried about me. I ran away once, and I remember her saying to me the next day "Oh Bitch I did'nt worry, I slept good last night" but you know the Bible says that you will reep what you sew.
I know that I will most likely fail my comp class, but as God as my witness my only mistake was caring.......

Heavy,Heavy...

HI Everyone,
I am currently trying to lose some pounds before my family reunion next month. I know that I should have been doing this all along but hey I never really gave a care. This whole weight battle has been driving me crazy but I figured if I did not stress about it then it would be ok. I have been walking 40 minutes a day, and eating salads and parfaits for the last 3 weeks. I have actually lost 8lbs just by doing that. After I had my last kid I gained so much. She is turning 3 this year and I am finally doing something about it. I guess it is never too late!